scattering of stars
the sound of running water
three doubts forged in fire
Tag Archives: haiku
Kyoto haikus
. road to okini
the old woman stoops
weight of a thousand worries
she turns to and smiles
. otagi-nenbutsu
stone buddhas pepper
the field, the temple, two claps
bend into a bow
. gioji
a river, a wooden teahouse,
a painted face in the window
a princess worn and awaiting
a bamboo hewer’s return
Just kill me
Everyone liked the second version of my previous slant haiku. JMN and Isha in particular liked the firmer closure. I think their observations were correct. As I was finalizing, though, I realized that they had enlightened me in reverse. I wanted a little opening in that closure, a little space for melancholia to leak in. But I did not want to revert to the rejected draft. So for now I have this. Just kill me.
or cp.
Addendum: I just re-read them and now I like the one everyone chose last time the best. Forgive me.
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Which is best (Haiku #1 or Haiku #2)?
a dream of narrow passage
Drops
Which drops?
A little slant haiku. Which do you prefer? The first one (“my”), which orients the field more personally, or the second one (“a”), which orients the field more philosophically/metaphysically?
you
are the rain
drops
falling
on my stone
pillow
xxxx
you
are the rain
drops
falling
on a stone
pillow
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